You’re pregnant after the loss of a baby and are terrified you will lose this child, too.
While you’ve so desperately wanted this, you’re filled with fear because you know there are no guarantees.
It feels like everyone else is so excited and expects you to feel the same. It seems like they forgot about the baby you just lost. You question if you will ever feel hopeful that you’ll get to keep this baby.
You want to be hopeful but also don’t want to get hurt. You feel disconnected from this baby and keep waiting for the bad news.
Everyone tries to reassure you that you won’t lose another baby. But you’ve already been on the bad side of statistics and hearing this isn’t reassuring. Your living in constant fear that you won’t get to bring this baby home.
Your emotions are all over the place. At times it feels like you’re losing your mind. You know you want this child but can’t imagine actually having them in your arms. You want to be happy but also feel guilty about the baby you lost.
It’s terrifying to face each new day knowing that there are no guarantees and you’re looking for a counselor who doesn’t think your crazy and won’t ignorantly assure you everything will be okay. You’re looking for a counselor who truly gets it to help you survive this pregnancy.
You’re not crazy and what you’re experiencing is normal in pregnancy after loss.
Life wasn’t always this scary. If you faced challenges you were able to lean on friends and family for support and you had faith that everything would work out in the end.
Losing your child changed everything.
Now that you’re pregnant again you’re consumed by fear. You can’t go through the next 40 weeks blissfully unaware that you may not get a happy ending. Your mind is constantly consumed by the millions of “what if’s” for this pregnancy.
You used to be able to stay positive in difficult situations. But hell, you’ve lost a baby before and you’ve changed.
You want to feel hopeful about this pregnancy yet struggle to fight the urge to protect your heart by not getting too attached. You don’t think you would survive another loss.
Once you saw the positive pregnancy test, you put your wall up. A part of you was thrilled but then you quickly told yourself to not get too excited. You want to let yourself be happy but don’t want to jinx it.
Now you fear you’ll never bond with this baby and can’t even imagine bringing them home.
You know it is normal to worry during pregnancy- but this is way beyond that. You never thought you’d survive the loss of your baby. Now that you have, you’re living in constant fear.
Since your loss, you knew you wanted another child but had no idea how hard being pregnant again would be.
Now you realize that getting pregnant was only the first obstacle. You now have to face 40 weeks of anxiety-ridden pregnancy all while trying to bond with this baby and at the same time grieving the loss of your other child.
You had no idea you could feel so scared about being pregnant.
When you seek Pregnancy After Loss Counseling (PAL) with Evolve Counseling, LLC you will:
- Develop healthy coping skills to manage anxiety
- Allow yourself happiness for this pregnancy
- Identify and manage conflicting thoughts and feelings that are preventing you from bonding with this baby.
- Create ways to celebrate this baby while remembering the baby you lost
- Find hope for the future without feeling guilty
The pregnancy after loss counseling process is intended to help you manage fear and process triggers that arise in this pregnancy. Together you and I will find navigate the rollercoaster of being pregnant after child loss. You and I will meet either weekly or biweekly for 45, 60, or 90 minutes and you will find hope that you can to face the world again.
Here’s what to expect.
You will be able to complete intake paperwork through the online Client Portal so less time will be spent on this during the initial session.
At the initial session, we will review the paperwork and policies. After that, you will get to share the story of your loss and current pregnancy. Feel free to bring any pictures or mementos that you would like to share- but you don’t have to, I know these are personal and sacred.
After you share your story, we will talk about stuck points and identify any goals for our work together.
Then we’ll decide the frequency and length of sessions.
I offer 45-minute, 60-minute, and 90-minute sessions.
During a typical session, we’ll start by checking in about significant things that have happened since we last met and begin exploring fears about this pregnancy and developing ways to cope.
The therapeutic relationship is essential to the healing process. The first several sessions are focused on establishing a trusting relationship.
As you progress through your journey we will reduce session frequency until you feel ready to stop the sessions. I always let clients know that they can still reach out and come back in as things arise in the future.
More About Evolve Counseling, LLC
As a Licensed Professional Counselor, a Licensed Addictions Counselor, and fellow bereaved mother, I help you find hope again through integrative psychotherapy interventions.
At Evolve Counseling, LLC I help grieving mothers go from feeling like their living in hell to feeling like they can face the world again.
When I work with bereaved mothers I use a variety of interventions, including mindfulness, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, EMDR, person-centered, to help them find ways to integrate this devastating loss and find a new normal where they can experience joy again.
I am passionate about helping grieving mothers find ways to continue loving and honoring their child(ren) even though they are no longer here.
Evolve Counseling, LLC was started 4 years after my first child was stillborn. After walking through my own healing journey I decided to use my clinical experience as a professional counselor and my personal experience as a bereaved mother to support others on this difficult journey. During my journey, I often felt misunderstood and alone. While everyone’s experience is unique, I’ve found it helpful to talk to someone who truly gets it.
You can read more about my training and specialties here (Link to About)
Who Benefits Pregnancy After Loss (PAL) Counseling?
Pregnancy after loss is terrifying, yet can be beautiful and healing. Pregnancy After Loss Counseling is suited for mother’s who have lost a baby, no matter the age, gestation, or circumstances and are either trying to conceive again or are already pregnant.
Pregnancy After Loss Counseling helps you feel capable of enjoying this pregnancy despite the fear you will lose another child. You will benefit from infant and pregnancy loss counseling if:
- You are trying to conceive (TTC) or pregnant after loss (PAL)
- You had a baby that was stillborn
- You lost a baby due to a miscarriage or early pregnancy loss
- You made the agonizing decision to end a wanted pregnancy
- Your baby died during or after birth
- You can’t imagine bringing this child home
- You feel guilty for wanting another child
- You fear the world will forget the baby you lost due to this pregnancy
- You feel alone and misunderstood
- You don’t want to get too excited but also want to bond with this baby
- You feel anxious and scared
- You can’t imagine feeling like this for 40 weeks
There are times you might not be ready for pregnancy after loss counseling. These included:
- You are active suicidal ideation
- You have safety concerns and need access to 24-hour care
If you are experiencing these issues, I recommend calling the Colorado Crisis Services at 1-844-493-8255 or by visiting their website https://coloradocrisisservices.org/
What Does Pregnancy After Loss Counseling Cost?
45-minute session- $150
60-minute session- $190
90-minute session- $225
*Initial sessions are usually 60-minutes.
I accept cash, check, credit cards, and HSA cards. I am in-network with Cigna insurance. I can also accept payment from Walk With Me Non-Profit and Kaiser if a referral is made. If you would like to utilize a different insurance plan, you may be eligible for Out-Of-Network benefits, meaning you may be able to get reimbursed either partially or in full from your insurance plan. In this case, I will provide you with a superbill to submit directly to your insurance company.
Where and When Can I Schedule Pregnancy After Loss (PAL) Counseling?
My office is located off of I-25 and Dry Creek. The address is 88 Inverness Circle East, Building H #105. Appointments are available during the following times:
Monday 10am-5pm
Tuesdays 9am-8pm
Wednesday 4:30pm-8:30pm
Thursday 8:30am-7pm
Your Next Steps
You can allow yourself to be happy for this baby without forgetting the child you lost. You can find ways to manage the fear and anxiety so you can connect with this new little one. It seems far fetched now, but that doesn’t mean you can’t start taking the necessary steps to heal.
You will be able to experience joy again without being overwhelmed with guilt. You’ll be able to manage the “what if’s” so you can be in the moment and enjoy your time with this baby. Ultimately, you’ll find a way to navigate the ups and downs of this pregnancy. You’ll see that healing is possible and this baby will never replace the one you lost.
To schedule an appointment for Pregnancy After Loss Counseling call 720-506-1568 or send me a message through the contact form.