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The unimaginable has happened. Life has stopped making sense. 

You’ve lost a child. You can’t imagine ever feeling joy again and feel guilty at the thought of it. You mind is consumed with “what if’s” and unanswerable questions. Picking up the pieces seems impossible.  You fear the world will forget your baby.

You’re pregnant after loss and are consumed with terror and anxiety. Nothing reassures you that you will bring home this child. You resist getting excited for fear of losing another baby. Yet you want to be happy and excited for this child. You find yourself overwhelmed by conflicting emotions.

You’re hopeful you’ll get pregnant but each month you’re devastated.  You feel alone. Everyone around you seems to be getting pregnant and popping out babies. Anger and resentment wash over you with each pregnancy announcement.

You feel defeated and alone. Nobody understands what you’re going through. They say they do but they don’t. Not really.  People say hurtful things or worse, they say nothing at all.

You find yourself self-medicating so you don’t have to feel the pain.  You don’t know how to live with the pain, so you over drink, over sleep, binge on Netflix. You reach for anything to take the edge of the pain. Yet, it’s still there and you know you need to learn a different way.

You’re unsure life will ever be the same again. And it might not. For that reason I’m sorry. I’m sorry life is so painful right now. But I am glad you’ve found my site.

Healing is possible

I know from both my professional and personal experiences that you can find a new normal. You can learn to enjoy life again without being wrecked with guilt and sadness.

Although it may seem impossible at times, you can heal. If you’re unsure where to start, I’m here to help.

You might be thinking, “but how can I heal when things will never be the same”.

When something so painful occurs, and life cannot go back to the way it was before, healing might mean evolving into a new version of yourself. Navigating all the crap can be overwhelming, but you don’t need to do it alone. I will help you navigate and find your new normal.

Healing from the loss of a child is complicated and sticky.

If I feel joy does that mean I’m not sad my baby died? No, having moments of joy does not mean you’re any less sad. But this can be complicated to work through.

I will help you find ways experience both joy for your life and sadness that your child is no longer here.

Guilt often goes hand-in-hand with grief.  The “what if’s” wreck havoc on our brains.  Did I do enough?  Am I to blame?

Together we will work through the guilt so you can remember your child with love instead of guilt.

When we lose a child, or any loved one for that matter, you do not stop loving them.  But then what the heck do you do with all that love with nowhere to go?  

Our work together will help you find ways to continue to love, remember and parent your child even though they are no longer here.

Evolve Counseling, LLC provides a safe, supportive place for you to explore what healing means for you. Let’s figure it out together.

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Adult & Adolescent Counseling Services

Learn More About Who I Am

Hi!  I’m Kelly Coté, founder and therapist at Evolve Counseling, LLC.  You already know that I’m a therapist, but what you might not know is that I am a survivor of the unimaginable.  Six years into my career as a therapist, I found myself living my worst nightmare.  My world came crashing down around me when my first child was stillborn due to a genetic condition.  After I walked my own healing journey, I became passionate about helping others  who have found they are living the unimaginable, living their worst nightmare.

I get it.  I know what it’s like to pick up the pieces and to deeply question whether there are even any pieces to pick up.  As you’re reading this, you may be thinking it’s impossible to heal and who could blame you-this sucks.

I am passionate about and dedicated to helping my clients figure out what healing means for them.  It’s different for everyone, which makes sense because no two experiences are the same.  What I do know is you don’t need to figure it out alone.

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